toodles!

WOAH.

I can't believe it's been a heck of a long time since the last time i updated this forgotten blog of mine! :p what is it?eight months? yeaa. -,- I guess that's what you get for being too obsessed with facebook. ;D lol. I believe EVERYONE's into "fb" right now. :p Even my nine year old nephew, Afiq signed up. haha. OH, and i can't believe it's almost going to be A YEAR already! Not to mention school's going to start soon too =_= Mahnn how time flies by very quickly! I do miss school, i miss seeing my friends and all but the thought of having to study and work hard each day again just really depresses me. -,- especially since i'll be sitting for O'lvl next year! gee, i'm scared already! :/ I've been so messed up in class this year, i've sunk to the lowest of lows without even a single big improvement :( I'm lucky to even have passed my final exam! D: I guess i will have some MAJOR stepping up to do next year.

but of course i can't say that i'm not excited for the new years cause i am! :D a new year, a new beginning! :p hehe. Not to mention i'm going to have a NEW NEPHEW soon! ^^, (my sister said that she'll be expecting sometime in april) THAT, i'm REALLY EXCITED for, cause you know how i LUHV babies XD haha.

The only sadest thing about this coming of year is that i still don't know what my future holds for me. The truth is, almost everyday i wonder to myself.."what am i going to do with my life?" Sometimes i feel that it's hard living in a house almost full of successful people -,-" i mean, i'm just so afraid that maybe someday i'm not going to be able to keep up with them.. or live up to my parents' expectations.. Just recently my "last" older brother, Zimin went on a scholarship to UK to study economics. He's taken the same steps as my father did ( daddy's an economist, you see) and i heard him saying that an 'internship' is already on the line for my brother at his work. It's like, their LIVES (my bothers' and sisters') have been planned out by themselves! My other older brother, Shukri is a PILOT FOR GOD'S SAKE =_= and NOW, it's going to be MY TURN soon and i have nothing...NOTHING to give. DAMN, i feel like crying so much right now. I best be stopping here. -_-

oh yea, and about my previous relationship..i'm sure everyone's wondering now what has happened. Only a few of my closest friends know. WELL, let me just tell you this, he broke my heart. :)) And he knows exactly why. He knows exactly what he did. I didn't do anything, that's all i'm saying! :)

Sorry if i've said too much though. I don't think i am, but i've said a lot of things around lately.. And that's when i wrote somewhere about girls my age at my school being too hypocritical. What i mean is that I'm going to say a lot of things now that i'm sure in a couple of years or even a year from now i'm not going to keep to. So yea, i hope you people do understand that.


AHNYWAY, so my friend, Ahnna sent me this 2009 survey via email ;) and i thought i'd try them. enjoy!

1. Are you excited for New Years?
- Omg, yes! I love celebrating the new year :D We always celebrates the new year!

2. What will you do different in 2010?
- I guess i'll work even MORE harder in school and try to pass my A.MATH -,- and every other failing subjects :( (AMIN!)

3. What will you not be doing in 2010?
- procrastinating. -,-" (i hope.) and eat less. haha. lol.

4. What happened in 2009 that you didn't think would ever happen?
- easy. i went on a trip to UK and PARIS early this year :D I really didn't think i'd go.

5. Best movie you've seen in 2009?
- NEW MOON, fer sherr! haha ;D

6. Best song?
- oohh! totally 'GEE'! or 'GENIE'! :D ohh i simply can't decide between these two. Both by Girls' Generation or also known as SNSD. I think they're the best, despite the fact that i've only first heard of this korean group this year and they're really not so bad. I love their style and dance routines. I even learned how to dance to both of these songs! It's really fun :D "gee gee baybay baybay baby!" "sowoneul malhaebwa~" HAHA. that's part of the chorus to the songs btw. :D Thank you Siti Hamizah for introducing me to them! (I don't know if she'd read this though :p) oh and there's one member i like to root in particular..Tiffany! :D i think she's the most talented of all the other eight members..And the prettiest! :] (boo Yoona) haha lol. Also, if i'd have to choose 2nd best, i'd pick 'by myself' by Tiffany, alone. This song really blew me away, i cried the first time i listened to it. :/

7. Best Books you've read?
- OH it totally has to be the THE CLIQUE SERIES! By Lisi Harrison. I'm like SOOO INLOVE with The Clique eversince the first time i read it! I now own all seventeen books and it'll be eighteen next january ;) hehe. You would probably heard it on dvd or movie when it came out early this year. I've already been a huge fan since then and was really excited about it and it turned out FABULOUS! Elizabeth McLaughlin really rocked at playing Massie Block, which is my favorite character from the book, the so called main heroine. haha. I also own Lisi Harrison's next set of novels called Alphas and i think it'll be the next best thing cause i already read the first book and it was AWESOME! i can't wait for the next series to come!

8. Best memories?
- i guess it'll have to be the UK trip, best meomories yet. :) i get to vist those AH-MAZING places i never thought i'd be at, haha and i get to make new friends with the form five-ers :p I'm totally going to miss not seeing them around in school anymore next year :(

9. Best food you've taste? :P
- haa. umm kimchi? i guess so. haha i taste it for the first time at that new Kimchi Restaurant just a few days ago and surprisingly, it tasted real good (Y)! :D i think i've once read that it is one of the world's most healthiest food! It's korean again, btw. -,-

10. How was your birthday this year?
- fine i guess.. the important thing was that i get to spend it with the people i love. :)

11. Do you think you've change throughout the year?In what way?
- Some mentioned critically that i wasn't myself for a year. I think that was really damaging. but no, i guess from all the things i've gone through this year, i've only become the strongest i've ever been. I dare that certain someone to try to change me again. I've got so strong,it would never happen. Of course my passion for Allah and my family and friends won't change, so hopefully i won't change who i am. But then again, i can't never say that i don't completely ;) I've come up with a serious habit of saying 'apan' ALOT. I've become such a goofball they told me. The biggest change i'd have to say would be my undenyingly love for kpop -,- i guess it all started with gee and then it just got carried away recently... with weekly's anticipation of KBS's Music Bank, haha and obsession to ridiculously cute korean male idol stars and groups -,- the SHINee boys, in particular is one of my favorites ^^, but i'd have to say, it definitely changed my point of view of the whole korean entertainment and what they can do. It's really not that bad, people :] What i meant is that, i'm never going to listen to Ashley Tisdale or Lady Gaga ONLY, right? haha. there you go. :)

12. What's one thing you learned throughout the year?
- well.. i've learn that when it comes to typical teenge drama stuff like dealing with friends or mean girls, i try to take the high road. I try to not REALLY say anything (sometimes!) and just laugh it off! and it kind of works itself out. I mean, eventually you sort of realise that your friends are the only ones you really have..so like, why are we doing this you know?

13. What is your new year's resolution?
- I guess it's always the same every year, to pass my exams (o'level! AMIN!) and to be a better person 0=] ( and to lose weight! haha :p -,- )

14. Finally, what is the biggest best thing that's happened to you in 2009?
- haha the BIGGEST BEST THING? I've made so many new friends! :) cool ones..nice ones..the not so nice ones.. -,- ANOYYING ONE! (ehemm.tuyah.) haha lol. ;) But the ones that i am most grateful for are these three awesome girls, Atiqah, Fazrenna and Farah :) or as i call them, Teqqah,Pajarr and Farr. hehe. Girls, i just want to say that i have never really made any regrets on where i was and where i am now. God knows how much i appreciate your friendship.. You accepted me for who i am and brought out the best of me. In fact, to even think you consider me as your bestfriend right now..well i am honored, and touched. :') I can trust them with anything now, and they can trust me- we'll definitely take each others' secrets to the grave. :) OH! ANNDDD these girls are also the ones responsible for influencing me into this whole korean-obsession world! haha. These girls LUHV korean so much, i sometimes look to them as if they ARE one. HAHA. lol. You know what? i think i'm going to post a picture of them.






Of course, everyone is welcome to take this survey too. i tag everybody! :D haha. i missed doing that :p

So anyway, in case i don't update again, haha, HAPPY ADVANCE NEW YEAR EVERYBODY!

Toodles !